战场墨菲法则【二】转！
70. Whenever you have plenty of ammo， you never miss. Whenever you are low on ammo， you can't hit the broad side of a barn.
你有足够弹药的时候，你百发百中。你缺弹药的时候，连谷仓那么大的东西都打不中。
71. The more a weapon costs， the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
武器越贵（或是越有用处？），修理的时候就要送的越远。
72. The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
武器的复杂程度和操作者的智商成反比。
73. Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
“战场经验”这东西，只有在某次很需要它的行动之后你才能获得。
74. No matter which way you have to march， its always uphill.
不管你从哪条路线行军，都是上坡路。
75. If enough data is collected， a board of inquiry can prove anything.
如果收集到了足够的资料，调查委员会什么事都可以证明。（委员会胡说八道）
76. For every action， there is an equal and opposite criticism.(in boot camp)
在新兵训练营，对每一个行动都有赞成与反对两种评判。
77. Air strikes always overshoot the target， artillery always falls short.
空袭总是打得过远，炮火总是打得太近。
78. When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down， the most important ones are always illegible.
当你查看你写下的无线电频率的时候，最重要的总是无法辨认。
79. Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
弹雨之中逞英雄的人往往死得最快。
80. The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want， but they know for certain what they don't want.
作为军官最辛苦的一点是：士兵不知道他们想要什么，只知道他们不想要什么。
81. To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
从一个人那里偷取信息叫剽窃，从敌人那里偷取信息叫搜集情报。
82. The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.
在你最需要它的时候总是卡壳的武器是M60机枪。
83. The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
最适合某个工作的军官总是在这个职位已经被别人占据后一天调来。
85. The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Medal of Honor.
最新最没经验的士兵最可能获得荣誉奖章。（意思是“挂掉的人就会获得美国最高级勋章”）
86. A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan， stupid enough to try it， and lucky enough to survive.
紫心勋章（美国授予受伤士兵的勋章）证明你聪明到可以想出一个计划，愚蠢到尝试这个计划，并且幸运到活了下来。
87. Murphy was a grunt.
墨菲是个大头兵。（就是因为墨菲老是做错事，所以才叫墨菲法则嘛:-P）
88. Beer Math --> 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.
啤酒数计算法：三十七人，每人两瓶，共要四十九箱。
89. Body count Math --> 3 guerrillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in action.
歼敌数计算法：三名游击队员加一个可能再加两只猪，本次战斗共毙敌三十七人。
90. The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
手榴弹的杀伤半径总是比你能扑出的距离多一英尺。
91. All-weather close air support doesn't work in bad weather.
全天候近距空中支援在坏天气里不管用。
92. The combat worth of a unit is inversely proportional to the smartness of its outfit and appearance.
一支部队的作战能力与它外表的好看程度成反比。
93. The crucial round is a dud.
至关重要的炮弹总是哑弹。
95. There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
需要散兵坑时，它们总是太远。（注：convenient在这里是指地理上的便利，就好像所谓的便利店一样，所以不能解作“舒适”）
97. If your positions are firmly set and you are prepared to take the enemy assault on， he will bypass you.
如果你的阵地有很好的工事而且你也准备好应付敌人的攻击，敌人会绕过你。
98. If your ambush is properly set， the enemy won't walk into it.
如果你准备好了一次伏击，敌人不会进入你的伏击圈。
99. If your flank march is going well， the enemy expects you to outflank him.
如果你的侧翼迂回进行的很顺利，是因为敌人正期待着你从侧翼接近他们。
100. Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
你越是感到好奇的目标就越危险。
101. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
奇怪的物体吸引炮火－不要躲在这种东西后面。
103. The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).
长官的自大程度与他的官职成反比（还有他的不值得信任程度和有害程度）。
104. There is always a way， and it usually doesn't work.
任何事情都有一个解决方法，尽管通常是不管用的。
105. Success occurs when no one is looking， failure occurs when the General is watching.
没人关注的行动通常是成功的；被高级长官关注的行动通常是失败的。
106. The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.
在你使用不安全的频道发布之前，敌人都不会监听你的无线电频率。
107. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight， your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away， and your canteen always lands at your feet.
如果你战斗中掉了装备，你的子弹和手榴弹一定离你最远，而水壶总是掉在你的脚边。
108. As soon as you are served hot chow in the field， it rains.
战场上，你只要搞到热东西吃，就总是要下雨的。
109. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
不要告诉副排长你无事可做。
111. Walking point = sniper bait.
去带路＝去当狙击手的诱饵。
112. Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
你夜间的宿营地是你白天行军累了的地方。
113. If only one solution can be found for a field problem， then it is usually a stupid solution.
如果一个战场上的问题只有一种解决方案，这一定是个愚蠢的方案。
115. What gets you promoted from one rank gets you killed in the next rank.
在低军衔能让你升官的行为会在新军衔杀死你。
116. If orders can be misunderstood they will be.
如果命令可能被误解，那它一定会被误解。
117. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.
奇怪的东西吸引炮火。你就是奇怪的。
118. Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended target. That round will be a dud.
迫击炮弹幕只有一发能命中目标，这一发是哑弹。
119. Mine fields are not neutral.
雷场不是中立的。
120. The weight of your equipment is proportional to the time you have been carrying it.
装备的重量与你需要扛着它的时间成正比。
122. If you need an officer in a hurry take a nap.
军官总是在你犯错误时出现。
123. The effective killing radius is greater than the average soldier can throw it.
投掷武器的杀伤半径总比一般士兵能扔的距离大。
128. When you have sufficient ammo the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are low on ammo the enemy attacks that night.
你弹药充足的时候，敌人两个礼拜也不进攻；你缺弹药的时候，敌人马上就进攻。
129. The quartermaster has only two sizes， too large and too small.
军需官那里的东西只有两个尺码：太大的和太小的。
130. The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
压制火力唯一管用的时候是用来对付废弃的阵地的时候。
131. When a front line soldier overhears two General Staff officers conferring， he has fallen back too far.
如果一个前线士兵无意中听到两个参谋在讨论，那他一定是呆得太后了。（参谋人员都是胆小鬼）
132. Don't ever be the first， don't ever be the last， and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
不要做第一个，也不要做倒数第一个，更不要志愿干什么事。
133. If at first you don't succeed， then bomb disposal probably isn't for you.
如果你第一次尝试不成功的话，你也许不适合去拆炸弹。
134. Any ship can be a minesweeper...once.
所有船只都可以当扫雷艇……一次性的。
135. Whenever you lose contact with the enemy， look behind you.
如果你失去了敌人的踪迹，转头看看。
136. If you find yourself in front of your platoon they know something you don't.
在战场上，如果你的位置过于靠前，那么你一定要注意是否忽视了某些潜在的危险。（言下之意：二愣子才冲在最前面）
137. The seriousness of a wound (in a firefight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.
交火后，受伤的严重程度与到掩体的距离成反比。
138. The more stupid the leader is， the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.
指挥官越蠢，他被命令执行的任务越重要。
139. When the pin is pulled， Mr. Grenade is not your friend.
拔下保险销后，手榴弹先生就不再是你的朋友了。
140. All or any of the above combined.
以上法则的任意组合。89
你有足够弹药的时候，你百发百中。你缺弹药的时候，连谷仓那么大的东西都打不中。
71. The more a weapon costs， the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired.
武器越贵（或是越有用处？），修理的时候就要送的越远。
72. The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.
武器的复杂程度和操作者的智商成反比。
73. Field experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
“战场经验”这东西，只有在某次很需要它的行动之后你才能获得。
74. No matter which way you have to march， its always uphill.
不管你从哪条路线行军，都是上坡路。
75. If enough data is collected， a board of inquiry can prove anything.
如果收集到了足够的资料，调查委员会什么事都可以证明。（委员会胡说八道）
76. For every action， there is an equal and opposite criticism.(in boot camp)
在新兵训练营，对每一个行动都有赞成与反对两种评判。
77. Air strikes always overshoot the target， artillery always falls short.
空袭总是打得过远，炮火总是打得太近。
78. When reviewing the radio frequencies that you just wrote down， the most important ones are always illegible.
当你查看你写下的无线电频率的时候，最重要的总是无法辨认。
79. Those who hesitate under fire usually do not end up KIA or WIA.
弹雨之中逞英雄的人往往死得最快。
80. The tough part about being an officer is that the troops don't know what they want， but they know for certain what they don't want.
作为军官最辛苦的一点是：士兵不知道他们想要什么，只知道他们不想要什么。
81. To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence.
从一个人那里偷取信息叫剽窃，从敌人那里偷取信息叫搜集情报。
82. The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the M60.
在你最需要它的时候总是卡壳的武器是M60机枪。
83. The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.
最适合某个工作的军官总是在这个职位已经被别人占据后一天调来。
85. The newest and least experienced soldier will usually win the Medal of Honor.
最新最没经验的士兵最可能获得荣誉奖章。（意思是“挂掉的人就会获得美国最高级勋章”）
86. A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan， stupid enough to try it， and lucky enough to survive.
紫心勋章（美国授予受伤士兵的勋章）证明你聪明到可以想出一个计划，愚蠢到尝试这个计划，并且幸运到活了下来。
87. Murphy was a grunt.
墨菲是个大头兵。（就是因为墨菲老是做错事，所以才叫墨菲法则嘛:-P）
88. Beer Math --> 2 beers times 37 men equals 49 cases.
啤酒数计算法：三十七人，每人两瓶，共要四十九箱。
89. Body count Math --> 3 guerrillas plus 1 probable plus 2 pigs equals 37 enemies killed in action.
歼敌数计算法：三名游击队员加一个可能再加两只猪，本次战斗共毙敌三十七人。
90. The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range.
手榴弹的杀伤半径总是比你能扑出的距离多一英尺。
91. All-weather close air support doesn't work in bad weather.
全天候近距空中支援在坏天气里不管用。
92. The combat worth of a unit is inversely proportional to the smartness of its outfit and appearance.
一支部队的作战能力与它外表的好看程度成反比。
93. The crucial round is a dud.
至关重要的炮弹总是哑弹。
95. There is no such place as a convenient foxhole.
需要散兵坑时，它们总是太远。（注：convenient在这里是指地理上的便利，就好像所谓的便利店一样，所以不能解作“舒适”）
97. If your positions are firmly set and you are prepared to take the enemy assault on， he will bypass you.
如果你的阵地有很好的工事而且你也准备好应付敌人的攻击，敌人会绕过你。
98. If your ambush is properly set， the enemy won't walk into it.
如果你准备好了一次伏击，敌人不会进入你的伏击圈。
99. If your flank march is going well， the enemy expects you to outflank him.
如果你的侧翼迂回进行的很顺利，是因为敌人正期待着你从侧翼接近他们。
100. Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target.
你越是感到好奇的目标就越危险。
101. Odd objects attract fire - never lurk behind one.
奇怪的物体吸引炮火－不要躲在这种东西后面。
103. The self-importance of a superior is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness).
长官的自大程度与他的官职成反比（还有他的不值得信任程度和有害程度）。
104. There is always a way， and it usually doesn't work.
任何事情都有一个解决方法，尽管通常是不管用的。
105. Success occurs when no one is looking， failure occurs when the General is watching.
没人关注的行动通常是成功的；被高级长官关注的行动通常是失败的。
106. The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.
在你使用不安全的频道发布之前，敌人都不会监听你的无线电频率。
107. Whenever you drop your equipment in a fire-fight， your ammo and grenades always fall the farthest away， and your canteen always lands at your feet.
如果你战斗中掉了装备，你的子弹和手榴弹一定离你最远，而水壶总是掉在你的脚边。
108. As soon as you are served hot chow in the field， it rains.
战场上，你只要搞到热东西吃，就总是要下雨的。
109. Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.
不要告诉副排长你无事可做。
111. Walking point = sniper bait.
去带路＝去当狙击手的诱饵。
112. Your bivouac for the night is the spot where you got tired of marching that day.
你夜间的宿营地是你白天行军累了的地方。
113. If only one solution can be found for a field problem， then it is usually a stupid solution.
如果一个战场上的问题只有一种解决方案，这一定是个愚蠢的方案。
115. What gets you promoted from one rank gets you killed in the next rank.
在低军衔能让你升官的行为会在新军衔杀死你。
116. If orders can be misunderstood they will be.
如果命令可能被误解，那它一定会被误解。
117. Odd objects attract fire. You are odd.
奇怪的东西吸引炮火。你就是奇怪的。
118. Your mortar barrage will put exactly one round on the intended target. That round will be a dud.
迫击炮弹幕只有一发能命中目标，这一发是哑弹。
119. Mine fields are not neutral.
雷场不是中立的。
120. The weight of your equipment is proportional to the time you have been carrying it.
装备的重量与你需要扛着它的时间成正比。
122. If you need an officer in a hurry take a nap.
军官总是在你犯错误时出现。
123. The effective killing radius is greater than the average soldier can throw it.
投掷武器的杀伤半径总比一般士兵能扔的距离大。
128. When you have sufficient ammo the enemy takes 2 weeks to attack. When you are low on ammo the enemy attacks that night.
你弹药充足的时候，敌人两个礼拜也不进攻；你缺弹药的时候，敌人马上就进攻。
129. The quartermaster has only two sizes， too large and too small.
军需官那里的东西只有两个尺码：太大的和太小的。
130. The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.
压制火力唯一管用的时候是用来对付废弃的阵地的时候。
131. When a front line soldier overhears two General Staff officers conferring， he has fallen back too far.
如果一个前线士兵无意中听到两个参谋在讨论，那他一定是呆得太后了。（参谋人员都是胆小鬼）
132. Don't ever be the first， don't ever be the last， and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
不要做第一个，也不要做倒数第一个，更不要志愿干什么事。
133. If at first you don't succeed， then bomb disposal probably isn't for you.
如果你第一次尝试不成功的话，你也许不适合去拆炸弹。
134. Any ship can be a minesweeper...once.
所有船只都可以当扫雷艇……一次性的。
135. Whenever you lose contact with the enemy， look behind you.
如果你失去了敌人的踪迹，转头看看。
136. If you find yourself in front of your platoon they know something you don't.
在战场上，如果你的位置过于靠前，那么你一定要注意是否忽视了某些潜在的危险。（言下之意：二愣子才冲在最前面）
137. The seriousness of a wound (in a firefight) is inversely proportional to the distance to any form of cover.
交火后，受伤的严重程度与到掩体的距离成反比。
138. The more stupid the leader is， the more important missions he is ordered to carry out.
指挥官越蠢，他被命令执行的任务越重要。
139. When the pin is pulled， Mr. Grenade is not your friend.
拔下保险销后，手榴弹先生就不再是你的朋友了。
140. All or any of the above combined.
以上法则的任意组合。89